Amongst Friends

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A Reddit post from A Woman who said her mixed feelings prompted upon receipt of an out-of-the-blue apology from her first boyfriend, during lockdown, dozens of others share details of their own experiences. The Bbc spoke to A Man who sent two unexpected lockdown-excuse me - and A Woman who has received one.

Irina , 26, received a lockdown apology E-Mail to your first friend

It was a Friday Evening back in lockdown, staring at a computer screen, switching between the news sites and Social Media when the E-Mail from James arrived.

Irina waited a beat, to remember try to remember The Last time she had thought of her first friend, before you open it.

"Irina , I know this is out of The Blue , and years Too Late ," he began, "but this is a message I need to send. "

she was 16 and ready for a friend, when she met James. It seemed like a normal step for a girl her age should take.

So much of her life was not typical.

Born in Moscow, Irina came to the UK and two weeks on a student exchange and loved the education system here. At the Age Of 14, she told her parents she wanted to leave Russia and go to a British Boarding School .

After some initial hesitation, she gave in. Irina 's mother was a railroad conductor in a rural part of Russia, if you fell in love with Irina 's father, a passenger on your train. She was 19, he was 30. Weeks later, she Packed her Luggage and knocked away on his door, 1,000 km, inform him That you will live together now. How could she deny her daughter to her own great adventure?

on arrival in England, Irina the Culture Shock felt immediately. Grew up in Moscow, Irina , inner-city-school hardcore had been, in her words, "". There were fights in the toilets, and open bullying. Here, she was amused visited by the mandatory chapel, and The Invisible social hierarchies in an English school.

Irina took made their way into the ecosystem, and friends. In the course of time, and after a joyful afternoon in a park, a boy on certain fixed her eyes.

James fit The Brief for a cool friend. He was cute. He was funny. At 17, he was a year older than Irina . He was big, too.

you wrote in The Next couple of weeks, and soon their relationship officially, although the cracks appeared immediately.

"If you are That age, status among friends is very important," says Irina . "And it was very important for James To appear cool. "

In public, it costs the jokes on the Irina -to the common friends. In private, James, was to be frustrated, if you are available and better than him in some things.

"If I was better than him, to crossword puzzles, he would be offended and say, 'But you're a Russian, your English should not be as good as mine,'" says Irina . "And I would reassure him by saying: 'It is not, I'm only good at cross word puzzles. '"

Finally, two years later, Irina was told by common friends That James had been standing, he cheated would.

Irina ended The Relationship abruptly, distancing themselves as best they could, to tell him she didn't want to contact.

she moved to another city for the University and a Fresh Start .

James texted sporadically over The Next couple of years - Always on her birthday and wish her a happy New Year . Finally, after an exchange, Irina , James, of the move for you to successfully hit, it would be better if you contact the cut as a whole.

James' response was fast and icy. He tried again, together with Irina , he wrote. Then he told her That she never message him again.

Irina stared at The Message and responded, Lol.

they decided, would be The End of this Chapter of your life.

The Years passed, and Irina moved back in a tech job. Well, friends, she found her rhythm in a New City .

If the coronavirus hits, Irina sent the work, you have a keyboard and a large monitor, so she could work from home.

And Then the E-Mail from James arrived.

the 800-word message, James explained That lockdown had forced him to evaluate his own behavior in The Past , and he felt he owed him an apology for his immaturity all these years.

He apologized, as he had said, he felt humiliated when he read the texts he had sent her.

And Then he made a stunning confession. He had never cheated, Irina - well That was a lie, to impress your friends.

He went on to write That he had, volunteering to help vulnerable groups of the population in lockdown, and now was the time for true reflection and the people are friendly to each other.

Transported back In Time , with a mix of emotions she had not felt in years, Irina went for a walk to clear your head.

When she came back, she decided to respond. She told him to Be Kind to yourself and said That everyone has made mistakes, especially when they are young. And Then she went on his apology.

I don't have a reaction to your apology. Maybe I have forgiven you, I might have stopped, nursing. I hope it brings you closure, I feel no negative feelings against you.

she thought for a moment, wondering if This Was a fair answer.

"I think he was looking for redemption from me," says Irina . "But it's not really for me to give it to him. He is the only one who can give it to yourself - forgive yourself. "

Irina , the E-Mail sent and went Back To your computer, your evening and your life.

Chris, 26, has sent a apology to two EXE-files during lockdown

for 10 days was in lockdown, when Chris texted Sarah

The Last time he had seen her she was lying on The Floor of her room, curled up in the fetal position, tears and hiccups break on your breathing. He left you this way. She wanted to have him.

This Was the result of a long and emotional conversation, and the completion of their eight-month relationship.

He thought of her occasionally in The Years That followed. They still followed each other on Social Media . But you disappeared in the store, a friend of mine in college. Now, seven years later, the image kept popping back into Chris's mind: Sarah on The Floor in tears.

Chris began to lockdown on March 10, The Day of the U.S. National emergency Commission advised to include restaurants and bars, and a presidential Directive called on the people to work from home, where they could.

in The week before, a typical day for him began at 5. 30. He had to work with his colleagues in the army base in Missouri, where he is going as an IT engineer, home, shower, eat and go Back To The Base . He lived alone in an apartment in the vicinity.

After the completion of the work, he would return home and go either With Friends , or make dinner and hang out online until it was time for bed.

With lockdown a lot of free time came. In the beginning, he has constantly engaged. But after 10 days the Zoom calls and YouTube workouts and the entire second season of the succession of his thoughts again and again to the image of his first girlfriend.

He and Sarah had met when they were 18, at a Military Academy .

"It was an intense relationship," Chris, now 26, says. "We spent all Our Time , all of our plans were together, and so our identity was. "

As a teenager, shared at the beginning of their career in the U.S. army, all of their problems with each other. As the months passed, to consume even though Sarah's began a difficult relationship with your family, you, according to Chris, and he felt ill-equipped to help.

When he finally told her everything, said he could not believe That she could continue, Sarah's in tears on The Floor . She was destroyed on the ground. This Was too abrupt an end to their relationship, She Said .

they avoided each other awkwardly for the rest of their time at The Academy , sometimes. Then they graduated and went their own ways, and so it remained, until, on the 19th of March, Chris sent Sarah a text.

Sarah, I understand That it is a long time, but I really feel That The Way That We Are at The End of the things was not right and The Way I treated you at The End of our relationship was a disservice to you.

I know we have both had a lot of time, separated from each other and I would really like to make That up to you. I really hope That you are well.

The answer came almost immediately.

I'm doing great!

And the two began exchanging texts.

she bought him to speed up, with your new teaching job That she loved. And, she added excitedly, she had a much better relationship with your parents.

Encouraged by the warmth of their interaction, Chris decided to make the text a second ex. Well, the ex may be a stretch.

The Relationship was conducted mostly online.

relationships, coronavirus pandemic, long reads

Source of news: bbc.com